Ok I started writing this blog about the things a coach has to go through. Well my first post had to do with an athlete who was head down the so called wrong path. What did I do? How did I help him?
Well before I tell you this very complex answer(sarcasm)let me tell you first that I have been with this athlete for 6 years now. I know him and his family very well. I have been there for the ups and the downs. Lets just say I can read him very well.
What did I do? Big speech, scream and yell, motivate, inspiring talk? No, no, no, and ...............NO. What did I do? Ignored him!!!!!! Can you believe it? It was like walking on hot coals hoping this would work. I know he has heard every story I had to offer. That wasn't gonna work. So, I let other people talk with him and explain things to him. I stood aside and treated him with the same respect I always have. I didn't acknowledge that there was a problem. I kept it all normal in our relationship. While others screamed, cried, and argued, I stood aside. Wow, you know how hard that was for me taking this chance.
Why did it work?
He didn't get the attention he wanted. I know it sounds bad. You would think are you nuts you should have been there. Well I've been there the other times and it didn't help, obviously. So I figured you know what, lets ride this out. He knows I am always here to listen and give advice. (So you understand if I would have seen any signs of suicide I would have stepped in) He could not believe that I would not say a word to him. It drove him to the point that he found help himself at a church. What a great feeling for me to see him figure it out on his own. I think this, this is the one time that he will remember because he is the one who decided, "I need to seek help."
Does this work for everyone?
Absolutely Not!!!!!! My advice to you is to always confront the person, seek them help and get involved. However when all the bones have been broken in your back from helping you understand that the person won't change until they realize they need to change for themselves. This is when I truly believe that they can make the life long change.
Till next time always remember you never know what you do or say may impact another persons life, either in a positive way or negative. So I say to you have fun with life and enjoy helping others but not before you understand yourself.
Come and enjoy my new site to promote youth, middle school and high school camps, tournaments, and events Sportshock.net
No comments:
Post a Comment